| (no subject) |
[Dec. 28th, 2009|10:17 pm] |
My accomplishments for the day include: finding out my car alarm remote is low on batteries, getting a hair-cut, and changing my windows theme altogether:
The snow covered shack at the bottom right is a slide show. The theme was fit girls but I changed it to something more asexual.
It's all on windows XP which I have yet to upgrade. Sometime in the next year I plan to get a laptop, and I'm not quite sure why. But then I remembered why, and it's so deceptively hypocritical I love myself for it:
You see, despite my many riches I have never been really happy with the acquisition of material goods. My 'pro capitalism' facade is at best, an open mockery of what most people probably don't believe but what we pay lip service to. Christmas comes to mind - for Christmas I watched 8 or 9 people exchange gifts with each other, and I couldn't tell you what half of the gifts were. Hell I have a hard time remembering my gifts (scarf, dilbert books, jacket, jeans, socks, memory is failing me again...)
I am not saying I don't appreciate getting nice things, but that I have never felt contentment getting nice things. That said, I still 'require' a computer, and it would be nice to have one that I can carry around, that runs on batteries, and can do everything I need a computer to do. Next on the list of required things are clothes, which I have plenty, and a place to live.
I have 2/3 of those things, and I am not sure where my third thing will be. Should I buy a house in Canada and live out my years being bored out of my skull? I find Canada woefully predictable, albeit vast and endless. I could easily live the rest of my life homeless in Canada, but I'd rather spend the rest of my life homeless on the planet earth.
Most the sentiments here are about as genuine as my phrasing allows -- I have never wished to find myself constricted by contractual obligations, whether legal or social. Consequently the idea of marriages and children, mortgages and careers disgust me in ways you couldn't possibly fathom. These manifest in my constant job changes, my frequent friendship abandonments, and it will manifest in my perpetual appearance of being immature, ambition-lacking, and irresponsibility, as the three concepts go against what I deem to be what we all seek: freedom.
One might argue that freedom comes at the cost of maturity, ambition, and responsibility, but I disagree; one who is free while lacking a constrained ordered existence proves to all achievements can be gained without effort. I intend to show this one day. |
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| Endless heaven |
[Dec. 27th, 2009|05:55 pm] |
I believe most people who will read this will have an idea of heaven, but even if you didn't, most people have an idea of paradise.
I imagine paradise to be a place where nothing ever changes, but it is so perfect that you don't need it to change.
For me, and this may be typical of pg or predictable, paradise would be an endless rave. Good music (to me) and always people around to enjoy the environment. Happy times will always ensue. Naturally since rave music is pretty esoteric, I don't expect other people to agree with me specifically but you can probably appreciate the sentiment.
What's your idea of paradise? |
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| Shot in the back by Buford Tannen over a matter of 80 dollars?? |
[Dec. 2nd, 2009|06:36 pm] |
TL;DR: Plan International billed me several hundred dollars over the course of several years for a charity I will never see tax exempted because they misnamed me. Consequently it was beyond hell trying to cancel my subscription with them
I'm serious. If I can feel justified destroying an entire charity organisation over a matter of 105$ I can't imagine what it would be like to be one of those terrorists going around blowing themselves up.
As I mentioned I was unable to find my transaction using the bank software. I know it will show up, but it is tedious. So I made a stop payment and wanted to wait until ... tomorrow to find out what payments were stopped, and then I can find out what details they listed me as. There were several possible conclusions that could have happened: I find out there were no stop payments, and thus my money was being taken by some third party that isn't the charity, or I find out that they put my details incorrectly.
Instead of waiting until tomorrow I went today to the bank. Typically the bank isn't as helpful as I would like because .. well, personal banking employees don't have that much power. However the teller had the phone contacts of a manager, and was able to pull the transaction details for my account. Thank God, because I can't (business banking access).
When you pull a transaction up, you can see several things: the account numbers, and the client details of the payer as stated by the payee. In other words, the 'name' they wrote as me, and the customer number. I don't have the customer number (ugh) and they were not able to find me by my name. So red flags were flying EVERYWHERE for the past few months.
Guess what - my name is Chan Mitchael. First name last name. Fucking idiots.
The bank teller was able to get the information and canceled my account for me. Bloody amazing. I did not have access to the database her ex-manager accessed (I wonder if one of my colleagues does?), so I would not have been able to figure this out until tomorrow or sometime much later (when I decide to manually go through every transaction for 35$ for November 2nd).
You know what this means too -- because my name is now Chan Mitchael it explains why I haven't been receiving any tax exemptions for that amount.
The next time anybody asks me to donate something for charity I will kick them in the face |
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| PG versus a charity |
[Dec. 1st, 2009|08:22 pm] |
It seems like I'm always having to deal with lawyers. This isn't the case...yet, and I don't expect it to. But I always have to consider legalities.
I have a few more monkeys to take care of. Four, to be precise. I won't name them all but one of them is my car and the other is this charity.
Several months ago I called them up investigating putting an end to my monthly subscription of 35$. I don't need to give a reason but if you insist the reason is I don't want to pay it any more. Anyway they were not able to find me -- as I thought about it, I may have put fake information (which makes no sense since I put valid bank info). I told them my last 3 mailing addresses, and as many phone #s as I could think of.
The girl said that she will have to have the accounting team contact me back. That was months ago. I gave up on it and earlier this month remembered about it when they took 35$ again. I put a stop payment on Dec's debit. Now that I think about it, I may have told the bank to stop the payment on the 3rd, not the 1st or whatever. I can't tell.
Anyway, I realized a few weeks into training (specifically yesterday or today) that the charity might be using our software. I did a quick search when I had a break, and lo and behold, they were! This mean I could look up their transactions for a given day! I asked my friend, and there they were -- hundreds of 35$ PAP transactions. I was unable to search by my account # though, but I merely have to sift through the transactions when I get access, and I will be successful in confirming they debit my account.
That said, I called them again tonight. They tried to waste my time asking for my address and phone # but due to my rude behaviour they put a stop to that nonsense. I faxed them the relevant details, and we'll see what happens tomorrow.
Ugh. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 23rd, 2009|11:20 pm] |
Let's get this out of the way since I won't be around / online as much as I'd like tomorrow since I have work.
To everybody who was around more than five years ago, I have no idea what you are still doing here. To be honest I'm surprised I lasted this long but here I am.
To everybody who wasn't around less than five years -
Joy
Kaycee
Yar
Araciel
Shiny
Sagensyg
Cz (I think)
Stu
Vaern
enano
mindflare
Alisu
Blue Harvey
Celes
Rubah (I don't think so but it's possible)
Cpt Maxx Power
Harlequin
Justin (Momiji)
Zach (Ouch, and I only think so)
Jiro
Shauna
Danielle, but not DanBoB
If I got that right, none of you should've been friends with me. As in it wouldn't have been possible. But here I am, and here you are. Grats.
I'm not sure what's going to happen in five years but the world's my oyster by then. At least it better be.
I love my birthday present. Squee~ |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 10th, 2009|08:21 pm] |
This is an exaggeration but I am going to be wasting 5000$ on rent because I won't be living there any more. I can afford it but I'd rather save the the 170$ per month -- it will cover gas and food and still leave me money to save/pay off bills.
Extra 1700$ in spending money for the next 10 months and I get a tax break from paying rent for a place I don't live in...I'd rather have the 6700$ but unless I can get somebody to cover my rent there....FFUUU
Now to transfer my phone # and find out when my contract for internet/land line expires.
Fuck. |
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| FFFFUUU |
[Nov. 5th, 2009|10:10 pm] |
Laura: if my friend doesn't show could I use u to practice on
Mike: I'm not in town but I can be back tmw night @ 730-8
Laura: Won't be any help. Test is in the morning
Mike: what is the help for?
Laura: be a dummy without ur shirt
Mike: Aww I would so be down for that ;D
Laura: lol you would |
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| Hi. 5 years ago... |
[Oct. 15th, 2009|01:38 pm] |
LJ has a lot of my friends on it, but not all. I am compiling a list of friends I've made only within the last 5 years. Not all of my friends are on LJ (even from EoFF) but it's a start.
If we're relatively good friends but were not friends 5 years ago post here.
Don't worry there's nothing sinister about *this* part of the project. I just want to collect some statistical data. |
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| For lunch |
[Oct. 15th, 2009|01:02 pm] |
I am having
A can of Chef Boyodee Ravioli
A bag of nachos
60% of a can of salsa
and 1.5 L of wine
For midnight snack yesterday I had so much mcdonald's it hurts to exist |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 13th, 2009|12:07 am] |
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Why haven't we had sex yet? |
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| =/ |
[Oct. 11th, 2009|03:18 pm] |
I might have found friends who are about as good to me as my family, and I love my family like nobody you can possibly imagine (and if you've met me and saw my good side you probably think I'm pretty cool guy).
There's a behavioural/negative rights/moral obligation I feel I should have to thank my roommate, but because of our history there will always be this resentment. Oddly in all of the times I brought this topic up nobody has revealed they experienced something similar -- is leading a person on such a rare thing? How do you get over it in order to have a lasting, sane relationship?
Either way, I wish I wasn't in such a mess that I could help people. It's actually not in my nature to be pathologically selfish but I honestly can't type this with a straight face. Maybe I am as bad as I think I am.
It's usually other people who say I'm a good person. And it's always other people who are good to me. I just feel like a cad half the time.
I don't know what this post has degraded into. Mom just substantially saved my ass, and it wouldn't have happened otherwise because I never ask people for help when I'm drowning. I'll ask when I'm about to die, and it's usually too late by then.
I interviewed for Royal Bank on Friday. I think the interview went flawlessly, no false modesty (wait is that the way to say that sentence?). Hopefully everything will finally start working out for ol' PG
In either case, it's quite surprising how cheap of a whore your ol' pal PG lets himself be. If I ever feel comfortable discussing my finances, you'd be like 'wtf' |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 6th, 2009|04:06 pm] |
Woot interview on Friday
Though, I am still suffering through nihilistic despair.
Harlequin and others I've talked to (before) about this tell me that a thoroughly subjective existence means that there's no reason to despair for the reasons I have (that life has no meaning and so no concept is intrinsically preferable to another). I don't know what I am doing wrong -- I too believe there's no objective reality but it simultaneously gives me freedom and soul crushing despair.
I wonder why I should live when death is inevitable. I wonder why I don't kill myself because suicide is not any better or worse, only different from being alive. I don't see a point in having morals because amorality is more fun but isolates you from friends.
One could glibly argue that I want more than what my actions deserve. That's probably close to it. I'm not sure.
Back. So maybe just summarizing my line of thought might help.
Imagine you are Dr Manhattan. Your comprehension of the causal effects of that which relates to you gives you a thorough understanding of what will and has happened to you. So in effect, you are a puppet walking through the script of a play. That to me, is the epitome of achievement -- you get to see the book. You can't write the book. You can't change the book. You just get to see it. We all see the book, but those who know more can 'read ahead' to the next page, or next chapter, whichever metaphor is more appropriate to you.
That trivializes everything and anything I do. Not so much that what I do is already predestined or anything like that but that no matter what I do, from being a good person to being a sociopath, but that whether I'm a sociopath or not doesn't matter. Clearly it doesn't matter whether I'm Hitler or U.N. Secretary General Kofi Annan (ex UN SG) -- subjectivity negates any objective measuring stick. If I say Kofi Annan is better than Hitler (and a lot of people would agree), I'm just using this yard stick. If I say Hitler is a good person I'm using that yard stick. It doesn't matter, and it especially won't matter in less than 70 years when I die (hopefully). My life my affect others but I'll be dead.
My understanding of Nihilism is that by overcoming it we determine our own set of values but that doesn't really address my issue, that 'everything is permitted' 1 when all values are subjective. Perhaps I misunderstand subjectivity, but if not, my interpretation negates almost any perception and (could) deem it all wholly worthless. It doesn't make sense having value of a thing that is worthless, even if it is a lie. If we could lie ourselves into a different existence, would it not be worse than the truth? What if, instead, I say that truth does not exist and we must lie to see something?
Not sure. I might add some more later, but that generally covers it.
1. Rosen, Stanley. Nihilism: A Philosophical Essay. New Haven: Yale University Press. 1969. p. xiii. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 5th, 2009|01:24 pm] |
Rather than bore the entire planet of subjective value worshipers of yet another rant related to nihilism whose ultimate value will still be nothing.. I'll just ask something provocative yet universal enough to merit response; however still has no value because nobody agrees with me anyway:
Say you have a friend. And a family. And other colleagues. You can draw your relationship between your social circle using a VEND diagram. Several independent entities will definitely be crossed at some point, but for simplicity's sake let's use this vend diagram:
In this diagram Red circle is you. Or me. Whichever is easier.
There's a blue circle connected to a green circle
There's a blue circle connected to a beige-ish circle.
Blue (and beige) are connected to me , but not green
I wish to focus on those.
In this example, the filled in sections are relationships. I have a relationship (whether platonic or romantic or business or misc) with each of the circles where there's an intersecting sector. So in this example I don't have a relationship with green but green does with blue. Say for argument's sake that green and blue are lovers. I know about green through blue but don't know green. I know blue.
Why is it socially normal to only have one type of romantic connection regardless of how the chain is connected? If I respect blue and blue and green respects each other, is there something amiss? Are people that prone to jealousy and if so why? Or are there reasons I missed?
I'm having a feeling of deja vu, but this isn't an excuse for me to go out and have sex with everybody. I simply do not understand why if two people have a connection, that connection has to be limited simply because that person has a specific (say, romantic or sexual) relationship with another party. I don't mean swingers here. I specifically mean what I say.
edit: I don't think green is what I think is green, but I'm not editing my words nor the picture. You should know what I mean |
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| kitty |
[Oct. 4th, 2009|06:43 pm] |
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Kitty! |
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| If this works I have no respect for humanity |
[Sep. 29th, 2009|11:40 pm] |
The thing with zombies isn't that it's a great metaphor for commercialism or for an external threat to our culture. It's that it's an unstoppable killing machine where each one of us who falls becomes one of them.
My friend Angie once asked me: if she became a zombie, what would I do? Would I kill her in cold blood or hide her away in a closet so she couldn't hurt anybody? It made me think -- are there other girls out there who like zombies too?
If a zombie were possible it would be the epitome of human endurance. They'd probably look a little worse for wear once the muscle atrophies, but until then, the scariness. I jog to keep up my cardiovascular health but even I would die to the endless swarm eventually...or would I?
If surrounded, or if forced to defend/be on the offensive, I could probably take down a few, but more than 10 and I'd have to start thinking ingeniously. But what has seven years of Karate really taught me? I'd probably just disable a few of them and then figure that a better way to go about fighting zombies is to lead them over some 12 foot ledge so they'll break. Problem solved.
Zombies will happen, and you will need somebody to save you. Trust me, I have it all planned out. Where to go, who to sacrifice, and which pokemon to bring along (fire types are useless against Zombies -- ever have to deal with a flaming, indestructible human walking toward you?)
My ideal woman should be somebody who isn't slamming the 'back' button as fast she possibly can after reading all this. You should be well versed in the art of Zombie combat, or at least able to hold your own against five or more rampaging undead corpses shuffling toward you. I will test your resolve on this -- whether by infecting people around you with the zombie plague and seeing how fast you can run, or tricking you on a trip to the cottage to see if you can swim where the zombies can't reach you.
Or we could do boring things like rock climbing, jogging, kayaking, camping blah blah ZOMBIES!
I like zombies.
( really, if you have to click this.. ) |
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| Fatty |
[Sep. 27th, 2009|08:40 pm] |
So
What's this all about? I'm not sure.
PG @ 20: 5'6 - 125 lbs. 8.7% body fat
PG @ 29: 5'6 - 137 lbs. 15% body fat
Jerrod's BF machine came in. I'm not sure what to make out of this. BF% is my objective standard for weight loss. I could go from 125 - 140 lbs by gaining 15 lbs of fat or by gaining some other fraction of fat and the rest in lean weight.
Quick math calculations say I gained 5 lbs of muscle and ~10 lbs of fat -- this is after losing around 30lbs. Ugh. I'd prefer it to be the other way around. It would require gaining 8-9 lbs of muscle and losing ~9 lbs of fat.
Another thing though is while I appreciate everybody telling me I look fine the way I am (because 15% BF is well above average), it doesn't really help me any since nobody's pushing me. I haven't had somebody challenge me to succeed, and so it gets to the point where I just make up constantly shifting goals in order to goad me into success.
lol gaining 8-9 lbs of muscle. I won't get the numbers I want for a few months. |
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| Alisu laying the smack down |
[Sep. 25th, 2009|04:29 pm] |
I'm talking to Alisu about weight loss (weird...but I never talked to her about it).
I started eating more food and have plans to start eating way more food in order to see what I can accomplish this next year. But my starting weight is actually lower than my target weight -- I'm 137/138 lbs now and I should be at 140.
Which is not bad -- the mirror she doesn't lie, but it does make me wonder...137? Why not 135? The difference between 145 and 140 lbs was insane and even 137 and 140 is pretty neat to look at.
For my mom's birthday last weekend, I finally saw my brother's gf after she moved in (I think, anyway). She kept pestering me about my weight loss and was jabbing my midsection. I told Ray 'Ray, control your woman' which is my catchphrase when she misbehaves (it's all in good fun you have to be there to see). It's pretty odd to have a girl you wouldn't ever make a move on hit on you, even in fun.
But yeah..135 lbs? Maybe? I might look too scrawny though. I tend to think I'm scrawny now, but that could be my body image problems talking ;D
Anyway, the plan for next year is to eat more and to keep working out. I'll figure out a way to get bigger yet~
Edit: speaking of which, my gym pants used to be so tight that I had trouble putting it on. Now it fits normally and there's some inches left to spare O_O what.
I'm scared. Hold me. |
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| Fuck this shit |
[Sep. 22nd, 2009|11:58 am] |
I'm going to punch my landlord in the face.
And I'm never doing this combining rent payment bullshit again either.
At the start of the money Jerrod didn't give me my money. Apparently instead of direct deposit he's going to give it to me in cash. Well thanks buddy. Were you going to TELL me any time soon? I wasn't even in the same city when the month passed and I didn't get my money. I 'WTF'd' and yelled at Ashley who then decided to tell me the money is waiting for me.
Well by the time I got back and cashed the money it was too late. So NSF check #1 (40$ charge) screws me over. I write another check and find out land lord is leaving for holiday.
The rest of the money is uneventful except I keep panicking every time the balance goes below the rent amount. Eventually my landlord comes back and I give him my check.
Then another automatic withdrawal puts me below the balance. I think it's the car insurance for the month.
So I top off the balance but it's too late. The check bounces again. 40$ again.
I write another check and landlord comes in on sunday I tell him 'CASH IT TODAY' and he leaves.
It's fucking Tuesday and it hasn't cashed. On Tuesday the bank withdrew my automatic RRSP contribution.
Guess what. I bet the rent check is going to bounce. I emailed my Landlord but knowing my luck it won't be in time.
I can't deal with this shit. |
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| It's mom's bday |
[Sep. 21st, 2009|09:45 am] |
Apparently, anyway. I celebrated on Saturday by going to a driving range for a few hours and eating Nachos, Onion Rings, and a mish-mash of chicken (wings, fried chicken strips, etc)
The adult kids and I got mom this -- it's something simple but with mom who rarely wears jewelery anyway it is pretty nice. I had planned for something more extravagant but that plan failed when you know..the summer happened. Plus I fail when it comes to financial planning anyway.
Sometime this month I let Ashley drive my car with her friends in exchange for 7 massages (she says 30 mins each). I have yet to call her on it, and I think I made that deal last week. Most of the day I'm spent at work, and after work, I'm bored and do things like exercise, run outside, pass out, video games, chat, and post on 4chan (huk).
I'd do more but am on a self-imposed break from lifting just to rest up. It doesn't really DO anything but apparently muscle fibers break down and are rebuilt. They can make you stronger. They can rebuild you.
And I'm waiting for the paypal nonsense to clear so I can look into this Data Entry job.
1pm edit:
I had to ask mom to cover my car payment while I figure out my expenses. Ugh I hate asking for financial help. Fucking 'emergencies' all summer took its toll on me.
I swear mom was right years ago when she said never lend money to friends. Next time something like this happens I'm not fixing my car or using it until I get the money to repair it. |
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| Thanks Ashley |
[Sep. 17th, 2009|05:11 pm] |
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( ねこ猫 ) |
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| Want to buy early grave. PST |
[Sep. 17th, 2009|04:26 pm] |
Earlier this year I was offered the opportunity to work overtime in order to clear some backlogged tickets. And so I did work overtime -- something like 11 hours per day.
After 2 months of it, I was practically dead but I had more money. I don't remember where the money went, which shows both my inability to manage money and possibly my spending habits (I hope not for the latter). It probably all went into paying off my debt.
In either case, I am seriously considering taking up more jobs to supplement my income. I have applied to two positions found on Craigslist(lol) which allow for at-home work -- one a genuine job for data entry and the other seems to be some sort of email spam review job. The idea being that since I barely do anything all day except crack out 5-10 tickets an hour in 10 minutes, the rest of the time can be spent doing something more productive than Left 4 Dead. If I can pull a second, smaller paycheck, it will still be better than drooling.
More to the point, when I was working 55 hours a week I was not stressed, but definitely not as easy going. I had money but that's all I had. I don't remember if I had time for friends or to do anything when it wasn't the weekend. Currently I'm considering getting another (crappy, but paying) job during the weekends to make some more cash. I figure if I can spend as much time as possible working, I can pay off my debts and save up for this magical house thing that seems more-and-more impossible with every day.
Not working is not an option. I have also updated my resume and sent it to my mother. She (and my friend Wil, by coincidence) work at the same Rogers Canada building. Hopefully they have a position for me that is relevant to my interests (ie pays more and is more of the same work), or at least some place that pays more and is something I can do. After all, I learned virtually everything I learned on this job....on the job.
Joy's still on my friends list right? If you're able to pull yourself from all of those boys and/or your work, let me know how you manage it. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 15th, 2009|06:36 pm] |
And just like that, Ashley comes home from work/whatever and in our convo she mentions how I'm 'so thin'
>< body image go away |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 30th, 2009|10:44 pm] |
I'm back.
Or something. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 15th, 2009|10:09 am] |
I'm at Ashley's mom's bf's cottage.
Yesterday I closed the door to the washroom and took a shower. Tried to get out for an hour..the door knob turned but didn't operate the door handle, so it was hopeless. I popped the pins out of the door frame and then realized....oh crap I have no way of exerting force on that side of the door from my end xD
So I climbed on the window and thought about jumping down..but there were the gas chambers there...uh..no
Eventually I yelled and banged on the door until they let me out.
HILARIOUS
Why do the things that can happen to anybody seem more hilarious when it happens to me. I was laughing so hard when I explained what happened to me ;D
Update!
Later the next day, Ashley's mom was 'making a point' by saying I shouldn't have my keys on the dock. They could slip through the dock, she says, as she dangles and then drops my keys into the water.
XDDDDD
And then...
Ashley found a grey hair on my head, and we started to argue as we usually do. Except in front of her parents. Her mom was like 'are you two dating?'
Oh geez. Awkward. |
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| Kitty! |
[Aug. 10th, 2009|06:12 pm] |
1) Bonnie, I miss your cat already xD
My aunt told me that she has a friend who cannot take care of her cat any more. So I may be able to get a new cat!
Oh Geez I've been converted. Help! |
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| Sounds familiar.. |
[Jul. 31st, 2009|05:26 pm] |
http://piepants.livejournal.com/130806.html?nc=8
summary: I and Jessica discuss the merits of being 140 lbs and 120 lbs, respectively.
I actually thought I was fat at 140. I am 140 now and look much better than I last did at 140
Funny how that is.
Seriously, this is a huge improvement and illustrates that it's not just what the scale tells you that's important -- it's how your clothes fit.
Take care all |
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| What. The fuck |
[Jul. 31st, 2009|07:37 am] |
I have a surprise coming up.
And Paul is throwing a party! Fucking eh
I'm looking forward to the month of August, and perhaps September? We shall see. I'm so excited.
I only had 4 hours of sleep today. I drove for almost 4 hours, and 3 of it was at night. But the drive back home was so...
I'm so fucking happy.
Things might actually be looking good for ol' PG |
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| Checklist |
[Jul. 29th, 2009|10:45 am] |
Taking another mini-vacation at home. Wish Paul would throw a party but my friends are all work-aholics and it's rare we get together except for birthday and such.
Remember a while back, I mentioned how I can work anywhere on the planet as long as I had internets? Well I still can. But certain places are not conductive to working.
My aunt suggested I take a vacation to Australia. She has a house I can live in, and so it is definitely on my list of things to do (probably in 2010 -- read on). I immediately jumped upon the opportunity and realized the cost of going is not very expensive - I have some saved and with the money owed to me I should be able to go. The problem is 1) coming back lol and 2) I will have to work there.
Australia is roughly 14-15 hrs ahead of me, so flying there is already a chore (I will have to take a day off work). And since it's 14-15 hrs ahead I will be basically working night shift. I estimate between 2-10:30am from Tuesday-Saturday xD
But that didn't deter me. I figured out how to pay my credit cards online, so everything would be sorted out overseas. However, is it worth it?
Upon thinking about it, I had to decide 'no'. I want to go. I want to meet Alice and get in her pants, and I want to see Australia. But it would be too hectic, and the risk of being called to the office is too expensive/great.
So I'll postpone it for later.
But as for USA, I have no problem going anywhere!
I already messaged my friend Charlie from TX (btw if you read this, hi Charlie!). I had to skip out on him when he was in NY state because I was fronting Jeff's rent again and couldn't spend money. But now that these things are behind me, I can do what I want, when I want.
BTW, I'd like to see if I can visit anybody else. If you live in N. America and can house a wacky asian for whatever amount of time, let me know. I will *not* hit on you ;D |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 28th, 2009|02:08 am] |
02:08am
*shakes head*
Has to be done.
I must do it.
09:12am
I'm doing it, and it's just as hard as it ever was.
Of all people, why am I thinking of you, Laura?
What am I doing?
Fake happy face for online friends! Yay
^________________________________^ |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 23rd, 2009|12:24 pm] |
So it's been over a week and Jeff hasn't even mentioned paying me back for the windshield.
I am going to have to confront him AGAIN, just like I have to chase him to pay rent, utilities, and anything else he owes me.
I intend to ask him whether he's told his parents, and if not, that I could (nay...will) do it for him. Ugh.
Did I mention he's unemployed?
I called the insurance company and because I had not made a claim in 3 yrs (because I'm actually responsible regardless of what you might think of me) the claim I made will not affect my payments, which is good. So I did him a huge favor (609$ in favors) by cutting the cost down.
I really should not have. But I'm either nice or an idiot. Maybe both. Definitely both.
Anyway, I'm looking at you, Dave: what should I do? All I have for evidence is probably Ashley witnessing it happen, along with another friend who might have, and Jeff's admission. And the bill for the replacement of windshield, and as well that I made a claim through my insurance.
Or should I consult a lawyer for fun? I would have to take him to small claims if he doesn't pay.
How the hell can you be that old and still be a child? A five year old breaking something and not understanding the consequences of such actions I can understand. This guy acts bewildered every time I go to him to get my rent for the month or the utilities or whatever. Goddamnit. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 22nd, 2009|10:16 am] |
You know how I visited the parents' place.
I'm back at home. Everybody's out. So I feel alone. I'm going to play with Ariel now...
Wait..
Wait.
Oh right. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 21st, 2009|09:08 am] |
At the parents' place. They aren't home but Ray and two of my aunts are there.
Ashley is wherever. Ariel is buried by now.
Landlord is being weird, but going to sign and renew lease.
I feel like I'm accelerating the trainwreck.
On yet another note that won't get a reply, I was fooling around with a syllogism.
Mahatma Ghandi said that life is suffering.
It reasons the solution to suffering is voluntary extinction.
I slept in my kid brother's room. On the floor. He's out of the country.
He has pictures of bunny on his dresser. It is possible to never forget. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 20th, 2009|10:04 am] |
There's no real training for this is there? It's like...hey we're going to make you be alive and smart and caring. But there's this thing we don't talk about, but it happens all the time. We don't know how to deal with it but why don't you check it out and if you figure it out, hey, we'd like to know too.
There is a way.
You forget.
Or you make her less meaningful.
Fuck you God. An imbecile can make a better world. |
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| Sums it all up. I'm sorry Ashley |
[Jul. 20th, 2009|12:25 am] |
Instead of a rant, I offer only this:
I bellow at the heavens; Silence is returned.
10am: It's done. |
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| Hypothetically |
[Jul. 12th, 2009|11:12 pm] |
It would be nice if everybody were to respond. I think I'll post this in EoFF as well.
Say you have a friend A. You treat this friend more nicely than he or she deserves (in your opinion). You aren't rude, and you acknowledge their existence and do things with them and when s/he talks to you, you respond.
You know, like pretty much anybody you know/are friends with.
The entire time you are friends, every so often another friend B of yours (mutual) will come to you saying that friend A is jealous of friend B and your friendship -- you are more buddy buddy with friend B and because you aren't the same way with friend A, friend A feels inferior or left out.
Do you care? |
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| Wot |
[Jul. 9th, 2009|09:42 am] |
I had like two drinks last night and I'm having dry heaves and a headache.
Last night/earlier today:
- Had the equivalent of 300$ of lap dances on the dance floor from the town bicycle. Except it's better than a paid lap dance. What the fuck?
- Talked with the most fit mom I've ever seen. She flexed her guns and I was like 'whoa. wait. what??' She showed us her tit tattoo so I saw nips. She asked me indirectly if my cock was small 'is it true asians have small cocks?' 'define small' 'less than average' 'what's average?' *topic change* Well bitch if you don't give me a number I can't tell you if I'm bigger than that.
- She was poking me a lot and realized I was not a soft doughboy (more on that later)
- Same girl asked Ashley and I why we weren't having sex. I facepalmed
- *Apparently* I was supposed to hit on the short brunette blathering about a billion topics at once. Wasn't interested.
- After it all, I was heading to my car when this smoking hot brunette and her friend walked into the convenience store. She told me I had a nice ride and she should've picked me up. I told her to get in the car.
- Ashley got hit on by drunks and this hilarious idiot who responded to her revelation of us going swimming at the beach that he's a good swimming. "I'm in the Navy. They train us to swim like 2 hours a day".
Fucking idiot. The guy looked like he was made of cookie dough.
I don't know what to think any more. That's the second time a really hot girl has hit on me in as many weeks. It's really fucking me up in all sorts of ways.
Ugh. Why. I'm so fucked in the skull. |
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| If your girl only knew |
[Jul. 6th, 2009|10:12 am] |
You know most things that bug me -- they go away in a day. It's so dumb but when you're flooded with emotions that doesn't really matter.
Be strong PG. Two more months.
Listening to Aaliyah songs. OMG stop it.
Seriously dudes - if you want to suggest I listen to something new, plaster it all over this thread. Torrent or rapidshare links are appreciated xD
edit:
holy shit;holy shit;holy shit;holy shit;holy shit
fuckfuckfuck
Oh.Fuck.My.God
edit x 2:
Aaliyah - If your girl only knew
omg. |
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| burp |
[Jul. 3rd, 2009|04:39 pm] |
So our landlord doesn't want an epileptic seizure kid living in his house, so the lease will not be renewed in Sept.
So I will be moving back to Toronto area, but where? Probably the parents' place, but I'd rather have my own place. Regardless I don't know anybody who would be roommates with the freedom to move out on that month. Ugh and ugh and ugh and ugh.
I'll talk to Joanne and see how big her place is but if it's a two bedroom it's not going to happen. I think I'll end up back at the parents place again.
I need to get my own place so this crap doesn't happen again. |
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| 97% |
[Jun. 30th, 2009|08:13 pm] |
I can practically bench my mass. I bet if I tossed a 2.5 on the weights now and acted like an internet tough guy I can get 100% today. But there's no rush. I add 5 lbs to my dumbbell bench every week. There's...6 months left in the year so 24 weeks = 120.
I should be able to bench 260 by the end of the year, given the same progress and not hitting a wall. Frankly I would prefer to hit a wall. Right now the only thing stopping me are injuries (I slept on my wrist funny and it hurt. A lot), and they do little to stop me from adding weights.
Okay I do NOT expect to bench 260 by the end of the year but damn will it be nice if I can. Also dumbbell bench, not barbell. Imagine putting 130 lbs on each dumbbell yeah..
Dream on PG
edit: some of you asked about my workout. Here it is:
Bench Press: 35+25+10 = 70x2 = 140 lbs
Lat pullover: 35+25+10 = 70
Pec Fly: 10+10+5+5 = 30
Military Press: 30x2
Tricep Press: 30
Tricep Extension: 10 :P
Rear Deltoid Row: 70 lbs
Dumbbell Squat 30 lbs
Weighted situps 20 lbs
Weighted oblique crunches 30 lbs |
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| wtf pg |
[Jun. 25th, 2009|01:26 pm] |
I weighed myself this morning. The thing is just over 140 lbs, so I'm 140.5-141 lbs give or take.
So to show you how confused I am I am going to outline what I eat from now on until I'm either done or it repairs itself. Or I change diets (ie I finish and will change my diet to adjust for weight gain goals)
Breakfast:
- Bowl of Raisin Bran and skim milk
Lunch:
entire can of tuna -unsalted, water drained
whole grain tortilla
about a tablesppoon of miracle whip
boiled sweet corn with pepper
Dinner:
Seafood pasta |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 22nd, 2009|08:39 am] |
I'm not trying to say anything. Some people have said 'IT'S POOP' but you don't keep losing weight from pooping you fluctuate.
How do you drop 7 lbs in 4 days? I feel like the guy in Stephen King's Thinner
Yesterday I ate 1/4 bag of chips, 3 sorbets, two chicken drumsticks, lunch, breakfast, and the day before I hate a Wendy's Baconator. The day before that I ate normally as well.
o_O |
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| Wut |
[Jun. 20th, 2009|08:27 pm] |
I exposed my ass to 4 of my friends and several strangers last night - it was part of a game where you choose something to do, and instead of telling people about my sex life for a minute I chose to show something they had never seen before.
So I exposed my ass. I'm pretty sure nobody has seen it before (that were there)
It merited an ass grab from Laura when we took a group photo later. Bam.
I genes good me have. I don't even work my glutes. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 14th, 2009|09:15 am] |
So we go clubbing after cheap wings night and at the end of the night I stay back to wait for Laura while Ashley and Jeff go and get my car.
Laura + Ryan grab a cab and get me to join them. Nice. I get dropped off outside the college and stumble through it. I am lost (I'm serious). Eventually 3 guys approach me for weed and I tell them I don't have any and...*think* nope, Andrew doesn't either.
So I make my way all over the place, hop some baseball diamonds, and find the street adjacent to my own. I hear footsteps. Shit the three guys are following me. I know, I'll go to the coffee shop!
Then I plow into the wetlands. At first it's fine, just a few inches. Then it became a foot. Soon I was walking waist deep toward home. Well I can't go to the coffee shop now, I thinks to myself.
So I go down the back yards and hop my fence, pass out on my deck.
A few minutes later I feel rain. Fuck you earth, I'll get you for this!
Ashley and Jeff find me sprawled on the living room soaking wet. I'm dragged to my room where I think I demanded vagina to perform cunnilingus to.
Good times were had by all. And by all I mean me. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 3rd, 2009|03:22 pm] |
I'm curious as to whether anybody's actually met a girl similar to the one on the left.
I've met plenty of ones from the right.
Ignoring your immediate defensive mechanisms, and any excuses like 'if a girl liked you she'd make herself available ergo the opposite events are your (male's) fault', do people actually believe the girls on the right have any justification for similar or comparable behaviour?
ASL (actually relevant) |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 19th, 2009|09:15 pm] |
I injured my right shoulder last week. It's still somewhat in 'pain' (like I know that something's wrong, not that I feel pain), but I never lost range of motion.
So as punishment I added 15 lbs to both of my dumb bells. Classical conditioning should 'teach' my body to stop being injured, right?
I don't know -- I never did well in psycho logy.
edit: Ashley said it might be operand conditioning I'm thinking of. I didn't reply because I don't know what it is. Looked it up -- it's conditioning your conscious behaviour through reinforcement.
I'm pretty sure I can't will myself to be un-injurable. If I could, I'm an idiot for not doing it earlier. |
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| Classic lulz |
[Apr. 16th, 2009|12:00 am] |
I didn't make this obviously. Bonus points if you know who did! |
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